Man's Shoes Set Off Alarm at La Guardia

The new Nike Air Hijackers are out.

Security officials evacuated a terminal at La Guardia Airport for about two hours yesterday afternoon after a traveler walked away from a checkpoint wearing shoes that had set off an alarm.

Have we learned nothing people? If you set off an alarm at an airport, stay still. Don't walk away, you didn't win a prize. Unless you consider five bullets slamming into your forehead a reward system.

Police officers and dogs searched in vain through the terminal and several planes for the traveler, a man who was not identified.

Wait, he got away. Hold on, I'm getting in my basement.

The man, who appeared to be in his 50's, apparently thought his screening was complete when he left the checkpoint about 2:50 p.m.

Even after he set off the buzzer? Way to stay on top of the situation security guys. He pulled a fast one and walked away. Do we at least still have his shoes?

The screeners at La Guardia believed the alarm was false and may have been triggered by a benign substance, like fertilizer.

You better fucking hope so. Well, I feel safe. You?