Thursday, May 04, 2006

"World's oldest person" celebrates 128th birthday


I'll be killing myself at around 50-something. People aren't made to live that long.

Friends and relatives of Cruz Hernandez's gathered on Wednesday to celebrate her 128th birthday, a milestone that might make her the world's oldest person.

Unless there's some 130 year-old woman hiding in a cave I'd say it's an easy bet that Cruz here takes the crown.

Hernandez, who relatives say spends most of her time dozing and no longer speaks, was surrounded by some 200 people at her party, some bearing a cake and others dressed as Salvadoran mythological heroes.
Of course she doesn't speak, she's already said everything she has to say. Maybe death has forgotten all about her. Either that or she's a turtle.

3 Comments:

Blogger f.b.i.t.c. said...

No mention in the news report of how she pissed herself uncontrollably for the entire party though.

128!! Fuck that, You're not supposed to outlive your kids let alone your great grandkids.

I wonder if she smells of cabbages?

May 05, 2006 1:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm willing to guess , she doesn't even know what's being done to her in the picture, she's so old she doesn't remember it's called eating...and who are these people throwing some kind a substance in that hole in my face?

May 05, 2006 9:21 AM  
Blogger YourSister said...

I kind of feel bad for her. She probably doesnt know any of the 200 people who came to her party and who wants a picture of you in the newspaper with people holding up your head shoveling food down your throat...maybe she didnt want any

May 26, 2006 6:31 PM  

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