Thursday, November 24, 2005

Any day can be Thanksgiving

As long as it's the last Thursday of the month in November.

Today is a day to celebrate the kindness of the Native Americans, who shared their food with the Pilgrims, who in turn, killed the Native Americans with Smallpox and took their land. Thanks He-Who-Trusts-Poorly.

Today is also a day in which we eat more than we should and laugh at those starving countries. We take food, shove it into other food, and eat until our stomachs almost burst. Then we throw out what we don't eat cause we're thankful.

We mark our thankful day by decapitating a bird. Does anyone else have a holiday that centers around decapitation...I mean besides Ramadan. Don't think so.

Don't get me wrong. I'm going to New York today to see family and eat until I almost vomit just like everyone else. I'm just saying we suck. I'm fine with that.

Enjoy the Turkey or the vegetables if you're one of those people who wears leather but won't eat meat. HAPPY THANKSGIVING YOU CRAZY COUNTRY.


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