Global Warming Could Devastate World Economy

That's okay. We probably won't live through it anyway.

Unchecked global warming will devastate the world economy on the scale of the world wars and the Great Depression, a British government report said Monday.

Why don't we have a world war instead? Those are more fun.

Britain hired former Vice President Al Gore, who has emerged as a powerful environmental spokesman since his defeat in the 2000 presidential election, to advise the government on climate change.

Forget scienctists who've been studying in the field for decades. When it comes to climate change and the evolving threat of global warming only one man comes to mind. Al Gore?

Blair, President Bush's top ally in the Iraq war, said unabated climate change would eventually cost the world between 5 percent and 20 percent of global gross domestic product each year. He called for "bold and decisive action" to cut carbon emissions and stem the worst of the temperature rise.

Can't tell a story about gobal warming without throwing the Iraq war in there somewhere. I mean, come on, can't sell papers on just the notion that the earths climate may make the world unihabitable for us which would leave us two options, space and the sea, and since we don't have gills and my car won't make the moon on one tank of gas, we're ultimately more screwed than Jenna Jameson trying to take on a serious movie role. We need to remind people that while, yes, we're ultimately not only physical doomed but finicially fucked, Iraq's not going as well either.

"It is not in doubt that, if the science is right, the consequences for our planet are literally disastrous," he said. "This disaster is not set to happen in some science fiction future many years ahead, but in our lifetime."

Oh good. I have something to look forward to then.