Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Scientists develop computer that can 'translate' a dog's bark

Apparently, a dog's bark is the equivalent of calling someone an "fucking moron".

What would a dog say if it could talk?

"Stop watching me lick my balls pervert. You're just jealous."

"Stranger", "fight", "walk", "alone", "ball" and "play", according to scientists who have developed a computer programme to translate dog barks.

Limited vocab. I'm surprised "feed me" isn't in there.

The special programme analysed more than 6,000 barks from 14 Hungarian sheepdogs in six different situations.

Look, I know when my dog needs to walk cause he scratches at the door. I know when he wants to play because he brings his toys to me. He wants to be left alone when he grabs me by the throat and shakes me like I'm filled with dog food. I have a Siberian Husky and guess what, they never bark, so...this whole thing is useless for me.


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