Thursday, March 08, 2007

Israel unveils portable hunter-killer robot

Have you seen the movie The Terminator? The one where Arnold Schwarzenegger is a cyborg sent back to the past to destroy the mother of the future human resistance movment against killer robots? If you haven't seen it, you may want to, it will better prepare you for the inevitable.

An Israeli defense firm on Thursday unveiled a portable robot billed as being capable of entering most combat zones alone and engaging enemies with an onboard armory that includes a machine-pistol and grenades.

"Run, it's Robby the Muslim-hating robot!"

The VIPeR, roughly the size of a small television, was invented as part of Israel's efforts to develop weaponry that could reduce the risks to its forces from hand-to-hand fighting against Palestinian or Lebanese Hezbollah guerrillas.

Who fights hand-to-hand anymore? That's what missiles are for.

The manufacturer, Elbit Systems Ltd., said that the VIPeR's small size and dual treads enable it to move "undeterred by stairs, rubble, dark alleys, caves or narrow tunnels".

Although a strong gust of wind may tip it over on its side rendering it powerless.

As well as bomb-sniffing and bomb disposal equipment, the VIPeR can carry an Uzi machine-pistol or plant a grenade. The weapons would be aimed using an onboard video camera.

Wars are now going to be fought with little war-bots. Seriously, why not have it that when two nations have a beef with each other we just play Pong or some shit. I hate this planet. Just don't come crying to me when your little roller-killing-robots figure out the world will be a better place without us.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

This story is hysterical, you're so right mad man

March 09, 2007 2:30 PM  

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